PRATIE PLACE

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Tuesday, March 28, 2006

Just wondering

I had a great discussion over home-made waffles with home-grown blueberries (eat your heart out) with my friend JM this weekend. She will soon be, as I am, an empty nester who lives alone in the woods - her son's going off to college in the fall.

As I did, she wonders what purpose a longtime mother has when her job is "over." (She says in her birth family the rules state: "Eighteen and OUT.")

I started Pratie Place when my son Zed began his last semester of high school. It's seen me through the transition my friend is anticipating. I was very anxious not to become one of those eccentric, lonely women who talk to their cats. This is why I adamantly refuse when Zed says I should get an animal. If I don't have an animal, I won't talk to it. (This is the same way I avoid eating Oreos - I keep them out of the house.)

After Zed left for college, I sat in a haze for a couple months. I wondered if I was just "finished," period. Maybe the world had no need for this ex-mother.

It was a blogfriend who proposed, when we met for the very first time, that maybe I was just resting.

He and I were both at low points when we met in November. I was feeling washed up, he was suffering from what proved to be a run-up to congestive heart failure. For me, our lunch was restorative - and the ballet was fun, too!

Then another friend turned me on to the Artist's Way. Though I found the book a bit too touchy-feely, it started me writing in a journal every morning, which helped me move away from my obsession with morose moribundity.

When my friend and I met again, we were both doing better - post-hospitalization he could walk clear across town and enjoy it (and he did!) and I had a new life full of interesting activities to tell him about.

Well, here's the question, which I've buried down here so only people who actually read this post will see it: Is anybody outside the Alborada horde still enjoying (or at least monitoring) this blog?

Please leave me an encouraging word, if you get this far. If I get no comments, I'll assume I'm writing for myself. Which has its own charms, I suppose.

The existential discussion will be continued at a future date.

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12 Comments:

At 10:01 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Melinima;

I use the firefox browser and a special 'daily' folder that I open in tabs first thing every morning. You are number 3 in the daily rotation (behind www.arloandjanis.com and www.bridgeclues.com, fwiw) I'm not an Alborada fan (I doubt it's on around Paducah, KY), but I enjoy a lot of the other things you post, especially art Friday, deer invasions and stories of your trips and musical exploits. I've passed several of your stories on to Jewish co-workers and to my sister who married into the Jewish faith. Hope you keep writing as long as you're having fun.

Best regards;
Bill

 
At 11:48 AM, Blogger MLight said...

When I get up in the morning I have a very strict computer schedule (otherwise I could wander the web while children faint of hunger). I check wral.com to make sure nothing catastrophic happened overnight and to see the weather. I check my blog to see if anyone is reading (grin) and check my e-mail. I look at Ray's weather forecast from Boone which always has a beautiful new mountain picture. And I read Pratie Place - since you always have something new and interesting. In other words - it's the first blog I read during the day.

Unfortunately, we missed your Durham concert a week ago. My older son (who loves Celtic music and would have loved the concert!) was going on a boat trip with people he knows from volunteering at the NC. Museum of Natural History - so we had to get him over to Raleigh in the evening to meet them. His first time away from home overnight (except to visit grandparents) and he stayed in a motel by himself! I always find your "empty nest" posts of particular interest since we're looking at the beginning of the process right now (with an 18 yo, a 14 yo and a 7 yo, it will be awhile until we get to the end!).

My last 7 years - with 3 children and one of them very young - have been very intensely "mothery" (particularly since we homeschool). But I can see, as the older two get more involved outside and as the younger one gets more independent, time eventually freeing up. And that's part of why I started my blog, even though right now I end up trying to squeeze it in at odd times of the day (like the post I finished around midnight). Though, for me, my blog is more to practice writing (okay, and to push neat books, music and ideas on unsuspecting passers-by) since writing doesn't come naturally to me.

 
At 1:11 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Melinima, My name is Beverly and I live in California, I stumbled on to your blog when i was looking for information on Alborada....Believe me i have enjoyed your blogging of the novela and i do read some of your postings....I have Pratie Place on my list of favorites and will keep it there... I am the mother of a 17 year old son.... and my 34 year old is married and out..i am of Hispanic culture and don't feel that i need to boot my sons out as soon as they are 18.... if they are ready to go and i see that i will encourage it but not just because they are 18....i feel work, my granddaughter and husband keep me grounded...instead of a pet.... keep on blogging....and even after Alborada is over i will check in....promise

 
At 1:12 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Melinima, My name is Beverly and I live in California, I stumbled on to your blog when i was looking for information on Alborada....Believe me i have enjoyed your blogging of the novela and i do read some of your postings....I have Pratie Place on my list of favorites and will keep it there... I am the mother of a 17 year old son.... and my 34 year old is married and out..i am of Hispanic culture and don't feel that i need to boot my sons out as soon as they are 18.... if they are ready to go and i see that i will encourage it but not just because they are 18....i feel work, my granddaughter and husband keep me grounded...instead of a pet.... keep on blogging....and even after Alborada is over i will check in....promise

 
At 5:00 PM, Blogger kenju said...

You are NOT just writing for yourself. I am here everyday, even if I don't comment.

 
At 8:06 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I found this page looking for Alborada translations (I am attempting to learn Spanish; 4 years of Latin makes a lot look familiar, but its still taking some time)...I will continue to stop by even after the show ends, I've forwarded interesting tidbits from your blog to friends (they particularly enjoyed the one from the guy who listed all the arguments he'd had with his g-friend). Keep up the good work! --MH in Kentucky

 
At 10:18 PM, Blogger The Science Goddess said...

I stop by here everyday---and not because of Alborada. You have a delightful and refreshing blog to share!

 
At 10:41 AM, Blogger Libby said...

I don't even TRY to read the Alborada summaries, but I definitely enjoy Pratie Place! :)

 
At 1:15 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi, my name is Mary and I found your blog while looking for info on Alborada. I'm hispanic, and even though my first language is Spanish (and understand la novela) I find your insight of the characters refreshing. I love your blog and admire your organizational skills. How do you do it? write, paint, travel. I can hardly keep up with my two children and part time job! Keep on writing you are an encouragement to me

 
At 10:31 PM, Blogger Gary said...

Hey, great post. Although I'm not sure it's bad to talk to cats. Especially if the cats don't seem to mind. :)

I'm not Hispanic but I know enough
Spanish to be able to(barely)follow a telenovela. I think my favorite is the one where Joan Sebastian plays a Mariachi singer. I don't remember the name of it though.

BTW, I like your blog.

 
At 10:55 PM, Blogger Badaunt said...

Well of COURSE I read your blog! (But you knew that...) I'm always amazed at how much you find to write about, and how you manage to be consistently interesting.

I agree with Gary - it's not bad to talk to cats. I have every intention of becoming a mad cat lady!

 
At 4:45 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

As you probably know I found your blog through my interest in Alborada. Heck yeah, I read all your other blog posts too! I like to read about the relationships you have with your kids and with Menticia. It's fun and interesting to view the world through another person's eyes because it helps me to see things I might not otherwise see. Sure wish I could hear you perform your music but since I live on the West Coast I don't know when that might be. When Alborada is over I will still visit regularly to see what's new in Pratieville.
Sylvia S.

 

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