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Sunday, July 24, 2005

My terrible, horrible dinner.

So i just couldnt decide what to do for dinner. I was alone in the house. i had half an onion in the fridge, so i sauteed it, figuring it was a good start for whatever. then i also defrosted two chicken breasts, figuring they were a good start too. only, i defrosted them in their plastic bag in warm water on the stove, which seemed like a good idea, except that the plastic bag totally leaked, so the chicken was floating in the bag in evil salmonella-flavored water which had thus contaminated the entire pot with evil salmonella water. so then i cooked the chicken. then I wanted to make rice-a-roni to go with the chicken, but it needed a can of tomatoes and I didnt' have any. then i remembered i had grits and i had once had fried grits in a restaurant once and it was awesome, and what else did I have to do tonight? nothing.

so i looked up a fried grits recipe on it needed bread crumbs. i had old bread so i started crumbling that up (chicken and onions cooking all the while) and then the recipe said that the grits needed to be chilled after i had cooked them so i put them in the freezer. then I looked at the rice-a-roni, realized I couldnt use the chicken water (now boiling) even to make tomato-free rice-a-roni with, because it was contaminated, and it would require 25 minutes of cooking besides, and it would still suck without the tomatoes, so I put away the rice-a-roni. also, the bread wasn't crumbling right because it was still too fresh, and I realized I would have to bake the stupid bread crumbs to dry them out.

then i said this is ridiculous, put the chicken in a bowl and the onions in a bowl and put them both in the fridge, took the grits out of the freezer, re-microwaved them with some cheese and ate the grits. and that was my dinner. so do you think I have too much time on my hands? my mother used to call this "summer brain" and demand that I go on a walk and write a journal entry. It was 99 degrees today and heat index of 106 so I skipped the walk. But here's the journal entry.



At 12:49 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

clearly, you are an idiot

At 3:05 PM, Blogger destilando cafe said...

Next time, throw out the defrosting water, dry off the chicken, saute it in olive oil or whatever you have, add the onions, the Rice-a-Roni without the tomatoes, twice as much water as there is rice, cover and cook. It will be a nice hot meal.

At 8:55 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

LOL! It is nice to know that I am not alone in the quest for something resembling dinner! I usually start off with great intentions and then, (due to my being domestically impaired) I end up making something that vaguely resembles pb&j or pizza!
Thanks for reminding me it is ok to have those days! ;)

At 4:52 PM, Blogger Steph said...

This is both hysterical and horrifying at the same time! And it's only horrifying because this sums up my own life - I have summer brain every day.
I just found your blog and don't know if you check in on comments on older posts, but I think you are amazingly funny and articulate.
Rock on.


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