Car mechanic hopes for rain...
... because last week, in the midst of our 100-year drought, he BURNED TRASH in his back yard... And he burned up three perfectly good cars in the process. Including his daughter's brand-new convertible.
"Are you dumb as rocks?" I burst out before thinking. "She cried," he answered with a hang-dog look. "Yep, I'm dumb as rocks. But I won't do it again..."
...I should mention the mechanic in question is not the ultra-brilliant, perfect-in-every-way owner of the garage, Jay, but his stringy down-home companion with a long grey ponytail....
... but anyway the point was, he was hoping the rain (we got about 1/2 inch) would wash away some of the blackened mess he'd made...
Jay: "Gonna take more'n that to wash away your mess."
Me: "Just imagine how much trouble a teenager would have gotten into if he'd done it!"
Dumb-as-rocks (though he's actually a good mechanic) thought that over. "I wish there WAS a teenager I could blame it on."
Then he peeled a huge bandage off his forearm revealing a huge shiny burn. "At least I didn't get hurt bad."
Saying seen on a bumper sticker: "I live in such a small town we don't have a village idiot. We take turns"